I’m not a super high energy person. I don’t consider myself to be a naturally organized person either. What I’m saying is that, it’s HARD for me to get stuff done. A tidy home, structure, and routine don’t come naturally to me. And yet, oddly enough, I’ve had multiple people tell me that I seem really organized and on top of things. I’ve finally settled into a place where I (mostly) get the important things taken care of every single week. What’s my secret? These 5 easy routines. They’re the framework that seems to hold my life together, and even though I don’t always adhere to them strictly, I come back to them again and again, because these five easy routines keep my life running smoothly.
Morning Routine
This was BY FAR the hardest routine for me to set up since I am not a morning person. But I realized quite a while ago that there were some pretty key things that I really wanted to be part of my day every single day and they just weren’t happening. In order to make it work, I had to start getting up earlier. The bonus is that almost all of the things in my morning routine are things that I look forward to, which makes it that much easier to convince myself to get out of bed.
Here’s what my morning consists of:
Wake up and make tea
Read a book for a few minutes, usually a Christian non-fiction book
I’m still not always the best at sticking to this routine, but when I do, it makes a HUGE difference for how I start my day.
Pack lunch
Pick out clothes for the next day
Set out everything I need for my morning routine
Put water in kettle
Wash face + brush teeth
Eventually I’d like to add a couple things to my evening routine, like reading more and working through this journal. I’ll have to evaluate whether that will actually be helpful or if it’s just something I think that I should do. The key to success for me has been that all of these are easy routines. The minute they become too hard or burdensome is the minute I’ll quit doing them.
Friday meal planning
Since I go grocery shopping on Saturdays, I almost always plan the meals for the next week on Friday. At first this took me forrreeeever as I was trying to figure out which recipes were a good fit for both me and Charles and our schedules. Thankfully it’s gotten a lot quicker for me over time, especially since I don’t reinvent the wheel every week and scour Pinterest for more recipes to try.
One huge help in meal planning and grocery list creating has been the Paprika app. It took a while to set up with all our favorite recipes, but now that most of them are in there, I can quickly plan out meals for the week and then export a grocery list. It’s so nice not having to go through each recipe and list the ingredients I’ll need to shop for one by one. And when it comes to actually making the food, I don’t have to hunt down the recipe from wherever it’s hiding (usually in a pin board). Everything is in one place. A free but more glitchy app you can use is Pepper Plate. We used it for quite some time before I finally purchased the Paprika iOS app.
Saturday chores
I quickly realized that after working 9 hour days, I just don’t have enough energy to get chores done in the evening. Especially in the winter when it’s dark before I get home. Since I like to knock them all out in one day, Saturday is IT.
grocery shopping
clean bathroom
sweep (and mop every other weekendish)
laundry
vacuum
any errands that need to be run
Church + Rest on Sundays
This year I’ve been trying to make a point of actually resting on Sundays. I believe that God had our good in mind when He told us to keep the Sabbath, so I’ve been trying to honor Him by doing that. It’s really hard, and I am by no means perfect. But even what little progress I have been able to make with rest on Sundays has felt so, so, so good for me. I plan on studying up on Sabbath and trying out different things, but for now here’s how I make it work.
work real hard on Saturdays so I have a clean come to rest in
don’t make a to-do list for the day
allow myself to only do things I “feel like” doing and not anything that I feel like I “should be” doing. This looks like reading a book in bed all afternoon instead of organizing our closets. Unless I feel like organizing closets, in which case I would do that.
Mondays always feel a LOT better after this restful day.
Do you ever wonder how to prioritize your life so that the things that are actually important to YOU really do happen? Friends, this is hard. We want to know that the most important things to us actually happen, because that’s how we make life meaningful! That’s a major reason why I have this space to write and share about my life. But also, there is so much opportunity and noise out there that if we don’t prioritize, we’ll be constantly spinning in circles. I’ve spun a lot of circles. It’s not very fun to feel like you’re running and running and not getting anywhere. So a small trick that can help you gain some traction and feel a little less like you’re running circles? Pre-decide what you’ll say yes to and what you’ll say no to.
I learned this trick from Lara Casey first and was recently reminded of it by Jenna Kutcher in this podcast episode. They are both heartfelt powerhouses who get A LOT of traction in the parts of life that matter most to them. Pre-deciding your yeses and nos is a seriously helpful way to minimize decision fatigue, bring clarity to your priorities, and minimize guilt and second-guessing about the things that you’re not doing.
One of the awesome things about it is that it doesn’t have to be for forever. You can make these your yeses and nos in just this season. For example, maybe you have a big project you’re working on. That could mean that things that you would normally say yes to (weekend brunch with friends, extra long workouts) are nos for this season. And that’s okay. The important thing is that you’re choosing your priorities.
4 steps to take to prioritize your life
1. Know what matters most to you
I almost feel silly putting this as the first step because it seems so obvious. But that kind of clarity can be surprisingly hard to come by. When you have a million things pulling at your attention, dozens of people you respect telling you what you should be focusing on, and you’re just trying to get through the week without an extra trip to the grocery store or too much fast food, it can be really hard to be that in tune to what you care about. I for sure have that problem.
Here are a couple of different exercises you can try really quickly to unearth what’s important to you.
Journal or brainstorm about who and where you want to be when you’re 80
Do you want to have explored the world? Start a business? Live on your own property in the country? Open your home to those who need a safe place to stay? When you’re 80, what will you look back on and be so grateful for? The answer to this comes more easily to some than to others, so if you’re really feeling stuck then try one of the next exercises instead.
Think about the things that make you envious
Are there jobs or opportunities or relationships that you really admire or are envious that other people have? Don’t misunderstand me. I’m certainly not saying that envy is a good thing. But I DO think that it can be a helpful tool in discovering what you really want. Maybe you’re envious of your friend’s relationship with her husband and how they have frequent adventures together. Rather than being unhappy in your own situation, prioritize adventures with your significant other. This might mean redirecting money in your budget from one thing to another or scheduling adventures way ahead of time.
Take a look back at the things you’ve done in the past that brought you a lot of joy
What are some of your fondest memories? Who did they involve? What were you doing? What aspect do you remember most? If it was a party you threw with all your closest friends, do you remember the food most? The good laughs? The games you played? If high school track is one of your favorite memories, was it getting to talk to your friend while you ran or was it long solo runs that were your favorite?
2. Decide what your focus is right now
Sometimes trying to think of a thing or two that really matters to you can be difficult. And sometimes the problem is that you think of TOO many things that matter. If you pick too many priorities, too many things to say yes to, it’s almost like saying no to everything. What’s helpful for me is to pick what my priorities are in a particular season. For example, while the process of growing through blogging is a priority for me in general, it wasn’t a priority while we were moving and for many months after. But now that we’ve gotten settled in and I’m spending less energy on figuring out basic life tasks, I can pull blogging off of the backburner. So think about what you can and should realistically focus on in this season and give yourself grace for what you have to put on the backburner. This step is hard for me, but it’s an important key in learning how to prioritize your life.
3. Make a list of things that will get you closer to your priorities and a list of things that will compete with your priorities
This is essentially your yes and no list. If nurturing my relationship with my husband is a priority to me, then spending time with him will definitely be on my yes list. If paying off debt is a priority, then certain expensive activities will certainly be on the no list. Ideally, your list of yeses will be longer than your list of nos. I’m still working on this!
4. Feel confident about your list
Other people will always have different priorities than you, and they will certainly always think that your priorities should be the same as theirs. But since you’ve already been so thoughtful about what you can say yes to and no to in this season, you can move forward with confidence that you’re making the right decision for yourself and your family. Don’t let people make you feel guilty that you’ve prioritized differently.
It’s always helpful to me to read other peoples’ lists, so I’m sharing what I’m saying yes to and no to in this season. I’m sure it will look different whenever our next season starts, but for now, here is how I’m prioritizing. I hope you can draw inspiration for how to prioritize your life!
Things I’m Saying Yes To
Lunchtime walk
Fresh flowers from the grocery store on a regular basis – $5 limit but they make me so much happier
Lifting weights 3x a week
Getting up early to read
Spending time with my husband
Eating lots more veggies
Sharing my thoughts on the internet (as an Enneagram 5, this is surprisingly hard for me. I worry that I’ll change my mind but that it will all be “out there” already and I won’t be able to redact or change it. And I ALSO worry that people don’t really care what I think, so why bother using up the energy to put it all out there? Both are not legitimate reasons to withhold from putting my thoughts on the internet, so I’m encouraging myself to do it anyways. If you’ve had a similar experience, please share)
Keeping in touch with loved ones
A tidy + beautiful home
Reading GREAT books – and making time for both fiction and non-fiction
Leaving insightful and/or encouraging comments on other people’s internet work
Clean laundry once a week
Helping my body get stronger and healthier
Expressing myself and my feelings more often
Staying in touch with what I’m feeling or thinking – even if I don’t take any action based on that knowledge
Balance in what we spend money on
Listening to more worship music
Things I’m Saying No To
Painting my nails
Alcohol more than once a week
Dairy
Homemade guacamole (too long to make)
Fictional books I’m not enjoying
Too much television
Staying up too late
Overthinking + over-researching
Being a lurker
Too much sugar
Worrying about what other people will think
Feeling the need to explain myself
Starting a family
Painting my nails
Fragrance in beauty products
Chores on Sundays
Escapism
Jumping from one task to the other
A puppy
Extreme frugality
Too much online shopping
Straightening my hair
Grocery shopping
Lots of makeup
Analyzing decisions I’ve already made
Haircuts
Inbox zero
Constant noise
Did anything on my lists resonate with you? Are there particular things that you’re saying yes or no to in this season in order to prioritize your life? I’d love to hear in the comments! Hearing how other people prioritize always helps me learn how to do a better job myself.
Hi, friends! I completely missed the May goals post, so I’ll recap how my April goals went and then share my June goals!
My parents came to visit in May, which was tons of fun! They’re our first visitors since we moved to D.C. unless you count Charles’ parents who helped us move here. I’m not sure that counts since we had hardly any furniture and we put them to work helping us unpack and pick up furniture instead of showing them the sights. Getting to show my parents where we live and the things we see on a daily basis was lots of fun! It was also a great opportunity to do a lot of tourist things that we haven’t done ourselves yet. This first part of the year we’ve been really focused on getting settled and haven’t made a lot of time for sight-seeing.
One big change for us in the last couple of months is the two new additions to our household. One of my April goals was to start fostering cats and that was the goal I knocked off my list the most quickly. Having cats in the home has been such an unexpected joy and delight. They certainly require more work (looking at you litter box), but their sweet snuggles and excitement to see you return more than pay off all the extra cleaning they require.
May Goals Recap
Hang the remaining pictures in the apartment
Didn’t do this one. Whoops! I’m not sure what it is about picture hanging, but it always feels so intimidating to me to put holes in the walls!
Write 50,000 words of blog content
I didn’t quite make this one either, but I did get a lot of writing done, which felt nice. Now to polish it up and publish!
Eat 5 servings of veggies a day
I did GREAT eating more veggies the last couple months, for pretty much the first time in my life. My secret? A super simple, super boring lunch that I eat every single day. I’ve been eating 2 hardboiled eggs and a couple of cups of fresh veggies dipped in guacamole for lunch every day. Have I gotten sick of it? You betcha. But not as much as I expected. The boiled eggs are particularly rough, but I never really liked them in the first place so eating them every day doesn’t help. But the veggies are still delicious. I don’t look forward to eating this lunch, but once I do, I’m always satisfied. The health factor and the EASINESS to pack it for work mean that I’ll probably be doing this for a long time.
Connect more online by actually commenting
Totally forgot about this one! While I commented on things a few times, I definitely didn’t do a great job. It certainly pays to have reminders of your goals around so you don’t forget!
Stick to our food budget. Moving to D.C. has definitely changed our budget a lot!
We for sure did not stick to our food budget. Not even a little.
Finish at least 2 of the nonfiction books I’ve started and haven’t finished yet
Didn’t really start this one, but we have more concrete plans for this month!
Sign up to be pet foster parents
Done!
Looking back at this list, I didn’t really finish enough to cross most of them off the list. That can feel really discouraging, but the thing I need to remember is that I’ve made a lot of progress. And isn’t that what life is all about? So much of the human experience isn’t about the final destination but about the growth and change along the way. It takes off a lot of the pressure I put on myself to be perfect.
We went to Georgetown Cupcakes with my parents one afternoon and these little bites of sugar were to die for.
Fun Things Happening in June
Summer school for Charles is in full swing
Whole30
When I’m not cooking (see above), I’m hoping to really dig into my goals!
Reading for fun. I’m thinking about giving myself another Netflix ban since my reading has suffered immensely since we started watching again.
June Theme: Spend out
I’ve been learning a lot about my unhelpful tendencies, thanks in large part to the enneagram. One of the areas I need to work on is being more generous instead of rationing and hoarding all my resources. This mentality is so pervasive for me, whether it’s time, energy, money, ideas, words…. If it’s a resource, chances are I try to hoard it. BUT I truly believe that God gives us our daily bread and because of that, I don’t need to ration the bread He’s given me today. I can spend out. The place that this feels most restrictive to me is in my energy. So this month I plan on reminding myself that I have enough energy for the things that matter.
Many of my June goals reflect this theme. I’m going to focus on saying yes to the things that I would normally say ‘no’ to or put off for another time for feeling a lack of whatever it is I need.
June Goals
I love Natalie Bacon’s post on goal setting. I like to use her eight life categories to give me focus and help me realize if I’m neglecting a particular area of my life. The eight life categories are environment, career, health, relationships, money, personal development, fun, and service.
Some of my goals hit more than one category, so I won’t always come up with eight different goals for each category. The great thing about using the categories as a guideline is that it gives me some structure to work with and helps me see if I have any blind spots.
document more on my blog and clean up my Pinterest boards
hang picture ledge
Complete Whole30 – We started May 27th so we’ll be doing it for most of June. Eating Whole30 is a lot of extra work in the kitchen and definitely a serious goal to tackle
Write out my top 3 tasks every morning
Friday adventures! I work 9 hour days and get every other Friday off. Usually I use those Fridays to catch up on chores, errands, and rest. BUT I’d really like to start setting a few hours aside for those Fridays for some kind of adventure. Charles and I are thrilled we get to live somewhere with so many exciting and enriching experiences nearby and we definitely want to take advantage of that.
Ask my people how they need prayer and then write down prayer requests in my prayer journal and then pray for them throughout the month
Here’s our sweet foster kitty hanging out at the top of the condo I couldn’t help buy for him (affiliate link – we got the dark grey multi-platform one and our kitties love it).
Bonus June Goals
One thing I’m doing differently is picking one or two main goals that are closest to my heart to work on and then thinking of the other ones as bonuses. This month I thought of a LOT of things I want to go after, but I’m not sure if I can realistically tackle all of them. Am I the only one whose eyes are bigger than her stomach when it comes to goals? So here are the bonus things I’d like to get done but aren’t as important so I won’t be at all upset about if I can’t tackle them.
find a local primary care physician and call to schedule an appointment (possibly one of my least favorite tasks in all of adulthood)
pull out my camera for some fun non-iPhone pictures. I haven’t done this in forever and I’m feeling an itch to document our current life a little better.
Make an IKEA trip for wall storage for our kitchen, jars for making kombucha, and baskets to organize our cat supplies better.
Go through 2+ years of phone photos. I have about 12,000 pictures on my phone and I’d like to go through them and delete all the random screenshots, duplicates, and non-memory related pictures. I got a smartphone in 2013 so I’ll be starting there and working my way to the present. My goal is to have it finished by the end of the year.
Call or text a loved one every day
How about you?
What are your June goals? Or is there a theme you’ve named for your month or your summer? I’d love to hear about how June is looking for you!
I have a love/hate relationship with Netflix. I’m not going to go so far as to say that watching tv is always bad, or that life is always better when television is out of the picture. What I do know for me is that too much television can definitely have a negative effect on my life. For one, it becomes a crutch, and I forget how to relax without watching Netflix. Anytime I have a free moment and I’m remotely tired, I turn to Netflix. Secondly, I really struggle with watching just one episode of anything. I love closure and rarely does a show give good closure at the end of an episode. With those two factors, Netflix can consume any available space I give it. The most disappointing factor, however, is that I don’t actually feel well-rested after a couple hours of watching a show. It’s such a let down.
The Alternative
If I cut television out entirely, I tend to give more space to the things that require a little more work but are more fulfilling to me, such as reading or working on a project. If I don’t have energy for those things, then I know that I should probably just get some actual rest. For these reasons, we recently cancelled our Netflix account. It felt like a pretty big adjustment the first few days. We would finish up dinner and look at each other, wondering what on earth we were going to do with our evening. Now that we’ve adjusted, it’s amazing how much more time we have for the things that are more meaningful to us.
But some days I am really tired and it’s still way too early to go to bed. After staring at a computer screen at work all day, reading might not sound like the best activity. I’ve had to think outside of the box to consider new ways to relax now that television isn’t my default. I thought you might be struggling with the same thing, so today I’m sharing 30 ways to relax without watching Netflix. As a bonus, most of these options are also free or cheap too!
30 Ways to Relax Without Watching Netflix
Listen to Audiobooks
Charles and I really enjoy listening to audiobooks together. It gives my eyes a break at the end of the day, but it still feels more worthwhile than watching a show. It’s also an enjoyable activity that we can do together. Here are some tips for finding great audiobooks.
Listen to Podcasts
There are so many great podcasts out there, both entertaining and educational. I love to listen to podcasts as a way to dip my toes into a subject that intimidates me. I listen to podcasts a lot while I’m driving and cooking, but if I’m not doing anything then I enjoy playing solitaire or freecell on my phone to keep my hands busy while I listen.
Do Something With Your Hands
There’s something so special about actually creating something in the physical world. Working with your hands feels like a lost art.
Read a book
If picking up a book doesn’t sound relaxing, think about going back to an old favorite or finding an easy book to read.
Crochet or Knit
This can be an incredibly relaxing activity, especially once you have it down.
Play a game on your phone
These can be just as addictive as Netflix, I think, so proceed with caution. But I enjoy playing something relatively mindless while I listen to audiobooks or podcasts.
Color
There are so many fun coloring books out there these days. This one andthis onelook like a lot of fun.
Try finding new artists you’ll love with Spotify or YouTube.
Go for a leisurely walk
These are always more relaxing than I think they’re going to be. Go with your favorite human, take a pet, or just enjoy whatever’s in your earbuds.
Flip through a magazine
If you’re anything like me, you probably have a backlog of magazines you’ve been meaning to read through.
Intentionally scroll through social media
The important thing is not to do this mindlessly. Maybe set a timer so that there’s a limited amount of time, or have just a few accounts you want to check. Social media can be really encouraging and inspiring if you let it be. You just have to learn how to use the tool the right way.
Call a loved one
As an introvert, this doesn’t sound super relaxing to me. But for you more extroverted readers, this might be the perfect way to kick your feet back.
Try hand lettering
There are all kinds of free tutorials on the internet.
Watch some worthwhile YouTube videos
I think I might be the only millennial that doesn’t regularly watch YouTube. I hear there’s some great stuff out there that’s definitely worth checking out.
Play a board game
Not all games have to be intense, thinking games.
Meet a friend for coffee
Bonus points if it’s a quiet, calm atmosphere. As an introvert, this doesn’t totally fit into the relaxing category, but I’m sure it will for many of you.
Meditate
There are a lot of neat resources for meditation these days. I’ve been wanting to try out Headspace.
Take a nap
I think this is the epitome of relaxation.
Bullet journal
You can start new lists, like where you want to go on vacation, books you want to read, skills you’d like to learn, and so on.
Try out a new recipe
What’s better than being well-fed and relaxed?
Enjoy a glass of your favorite drink
A glass of wine on someone’s back porch sounds like heaven right now.
Listen to music
It’s probably been a long time since you’ve done nothing but lay there and listen to your favorite music. Consider revisiting some of your favorites this way and get lost in the music. It would also be a great way to try out a new album.
Pet your animal
This is good therapy for you and them.
Practice an instrument
This is more likely relaxing if you’re not a brand new beginner.
Try your hand at painting or drawing
It doesn’t have to be any good. Just let your mind wander while you do it and I promise it’ll be relaxing.
Write something
Whether it’s a hand-written letter to a friend or in your journal, writing can be incredibly relaxing.
Do yoga or light stretching
You’ll be amazed how much better your body will feel afterwards
Go for a bike ride
Just take a leisurely ride around the neighborhood. The fresh air will feel amazing.
Organize
For some reason, getting into the groove of organization can feel really meditative for me. I’m sure some of you will feel this way too.
So there you have it, 30 ways to relax without watching Netflix. If you’re thinking about cutting back on tv so that it’s not your default relaxation activity, try creating your own list of relaxing activities. That way, when you’re in the moment and nothing is coming to you except your favorite show, you’ll have some ideas of your own. Anything I missed? I’d love to hear what’s on your list!
One of the biggest lightning-bolt moments I’ve had in my life is when I figured out my Myers-Briggs personality type. I have always felt like I’m different from my family and a lot of the people that I know. When I was younger, a lot of my friends would tell me that I ‘was like a man’ because I didn’t cry in movies… Something every middle-school girl wants to hear. I knew that I thought differently from a lot of people, and from most women in particular. When I learned how and why I think differently, the world became so much clearer to me. Suddenly it made sense why I rarely cry in movies. The differences I have from other women weren’t signs of weakness but just that…. differences. Ones that I could perceive and understand. Maybe you feel like an average woman and don’t have the drive to figure out why you’re different. If so, there are certainly still benefits to learning about personality type, like understanding the people around you. Here’s why I think everyone should learn their Myers-Briggs personality type.
First of all, what is MBTI?
Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) is a personality framework based on Jung’s theory of psychological traits put together by Isabel Briggs Myers and her mother, Katherine Cook Briggs. They originally created it to help women who were entering the workforce for the very first time during World War II. It divides people into 16 different personality types, depicted by 4 different letters. For example, I’m an INTP. You can take a test to get an idea of what your type might be here or here.
Now that you know what it is, I’ll explain how it can be helpful to you to know your MBTI.
MBTI helps you understand yourself
Ever wonder, Why am I like this? Why do I do this? Knowing how your own brain works is a lot more difficult than you think. Reading up on my Myers-Briggs has helped me understand myself so much more. Knowing your type helps you avoid the trap of thinking that there’s something wrong with you, that you’re better than everyone else, or that people will never get you. I promise you, when you read your profile, you’ll have a lightning bolt moment and say something along the lines of, “THAT’S why I do that!” or “Now I get why that drives me so crazy!” Understanding yourself can be a huge relief. But it’s just the first step.
MBTI helps you grow as a person
A lot of people use personality type as an excuse for why they are the way that they are. While it might help to know that you’re an introvert and that you need alone time, the purpose of that knowledge isn’t so that you can let your partner do all the housework while you get “alone time” watching Netflix because it’s just your “personality .” Rather, the point of knowing your type is so that you can know how you specifically can grow as a person. In this example, you would use your knowledge of yourself as an introvert to plan plenty of alone time into your week so you can also fulfill your responsibilities. Or better yet, you can start paying attention to the type of alone time that is most fulfilling to you. For me, watching Netflix doesn’t really count as alone time because it doesn’t do much to restore me or fill me up. I’m much better suited to read a book or spend time writing. Having that kind of self-knowledge can really make a difference in how you spend your time.
MBTI helps you understand other people better
Knowing how my brain works also helps me know how other people’s brains work. For example, I’m a Thinker. I make decisions based on what seems most logical to me rather than basing them on how they feel or what they’ll mean for those I love. To be sure, I include the feelings of other people when I’m considering the logic, but that’s not my primary motivation. People who are Feelers are oftentimes much more compassionate than I am and do a better job of sharing their emotions with others. Knowing the strengths of a Feeler helps me be less judgmental of them. I can focus on the positive traits instead of thinking of them as irrational and weak-willed, and I have a better understanding of why they’re making a decision that seems irrational to me. And knowing the strengths of a Thinker helps me feel less threatened by Feelers. Being able to make decisions without emotions clouding them is definitely a strength. We need both types.
Maybe you’ve always struggled with planning activities with other people. Your best friend might be a fly-by-the-seat-of-her-pants type, and it drives you up the wall. She texts you at 10 am Saturday morning to ask you if you want to get coffee that afternoon and it makes you feel like she doesn’t value your friendship enough to plan ahead. That’s not really what’s going on though. She isn’t doing that in an attempt to ruin your weekend plans or because she doesn’t care about you. It’s a difference in personalities. Some people (Judgers) like to plan ahead. They make schedules and stick to it. Others (Perceivers) love to be flexible and are constantly reevaluating what the best options are. She texted you because she realized that spending time with you was the best possible way to spend her afternoon. I’m sure you can see how understanding different personality types can help reduce a lot of friction in your relationships.
Understanding other people better helps your relationships
We touched on this in the earlier paragraph, but underdasting personality types is incredibly helpful for your relationships. Maybe you don’t understand why your dad has to know why you’re telling him something before you start telling him. Maybe your partner’s insistence on talking to every single person you walk by in the grocery store drives you crazy. Whatever it is, knowing how your brains work differently can make it so much easier to be patient with the people in your life.
Not only that, but knowing your own personality type can help you better explain yourself to someone who just doesn’t get you. Maybe your sister doesn’t understand why it bothers you so much when she constantly starts arguments about philosophy. Maybe you drive your sister crazy by always playing the devil’s advocate in discussions. Both of these things can better be understood through personality types. When you understand it yourself, it’s easier to explain it to others. That still doesn’t mean that you get to use your personality as an excuse. You’re just helping people understand while you work to meet in the middle.
MBTI helps you at work
One of the great things about learning your type is that it helps you know your strengths and weaknesses, which is invaluable for your work life. Maybe you’re a Perceiver and you love to be able go go with the flow and have a slightly more flexible work schedule. Maybe inconsistency drives you crazy. Knowing your preferences more clearly can help you make decisions for your job, and even what kind of job you’re in. When you know your weaknesses, you can put systems in place to help you stay on top of things.
Understanding personality types can also be incredibly useful in work relationships as well. You’ll be able to communicate your needs to your boss better. If you’re a manager, you’ll be able to delegate tasks to the right person. You’ll also be able to tell when your personality differences are what’s driving you crazy about a co-worker and when it’s something else. MBTI is definitely a great tool to use in the workplace.
Specific ways knowing I’m an INTP has helped me
I know I need to resist the tendency to never try things until I’m perfect.
This has been a huge barrier for me in starting a blog. I felt like I had to know all the things about blogging before I ever started one myself. If I had started when I wanted to half a decade ago, I would know a lot more than I do now. Done is better than perfect. That’s a mantra that I have to repeat to myself a lot.
I know I need to force myself to get out there and do things.
I could seriously spend the majority of my life all in my head. Knowing this tendency helps me better realize that I should do more in the physical world. When I get home from spending all day staring into a computer at work, instead of opening up a book and spending more time in my head, I can choose to do yoga and then cook dinner. And THEN I’ll read my book 😉
I know I’m not emotionally broken.
I realize this sounds a little melodramatic, but I’ve honestly wondered this many times in my life. Like when I don’t cry during a really sad movie, or I don’t feel strong emotions while an emotionally-charged event is taking place. I’m not broken, my brain just works differently. I definitely still feel emotions, and strong ones at that. I just have the tendency to ignore them. Now I’m learning to pay more attention to what I’m feeling.
Where to learn more
If you’re wanting to learn more about your personality type, this is a great book to read. In this book, Anne has an entire chapter on different personality frameworks, explaining what they are and why they’re useful. And, of course, she has an entire chapter devoted to MBTI.
This book is written by Isabel Briggs Myers herself. Though I haven’t read it myself, I’ve been told that it’s incredibly useful and a great place to start.
I’m currently reading this book about the different types’ creativity. I love that the author does away with the idea that there are creative types and non-creative types. We all create in our own ways. This book is a great way to learn your creative strengths.
I’ve been listening to the Personality Hacker Podcast off and on for a couple years and find it incredibly informative. After you find your type, you can search for it and listen to episodes that specifically touch on your personality.
Leave a comment and let me know your personality type! I’d love to learn more about your journeys as well!
Hi, I’m Kelsey! I live in the DC area with my husband and two cats. I currently spend my days working from home, reading all the books, and enjoying home life in our new-to-us 1940s condo. Read more about me here.
