One of the biggest lightning-bolt moments I’ve had in my life is when I figured out my Myers-Briggs personality type. I have always felt like I’m different from my family and a lot of the people that I know. When I was younger, a lot of my friends would tell me that I ‘was like a man’ because I didn’t cry in movies… Something every middle-school girl wants to hear. I knew that I thought differently from a lot of people, and from most women in particular. When I learned how and why I think differently, the world became so much clearer to me. Suddenly it made sense why I rarely cry in movies. The differences I have from other women weren’t signs of weakness but just that…. differences. Ones that I could perceive and understand. Maybe you feel like an average woman and don’t have the drive to figure out why you’re different. If so, there are certainly still benefits to learning about personality type, like understanding the people around you. Here’s why I think everyone should learn their Myers-Briggs personality type.
First of all, what is MBTI?
Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) is a personality framework based on Jung’s theory of psychological traits put together by Isabel Briggs Myers and her mother, Katherine Cook Briggs. They originally created it to help women who were entering the workforce for the very first time during World War II. It divides people into 16 different personality types, depicted by 4 different letters. For example, I’m an INTP. You can take a test to get an idea of what your type might be here or here.
Now that you know what it is, I’ll explain how it can be helpful to you to know your MBTI.
MBTI helps you understand yourself
Ever wonder, Why am I like this? Why do I do this? Knowing how your own brain works is a lot more difficult than you think. Reading up on my Myers-Briggs has helped me understand myself so much more. Knowing your type helps you avoid the trap of thinking that there’s something wrong with you, that you’re better than everyone else, or that people will never get you. I promise you, when you read your profile, you’ll have a lightning bolt moment and say something along the lines of, “THAT’S why I do that!” or “Now I get why that drives me so crazy!” Understanding yourself can be a huge relief. But it’s just the first step.
MBTI helps you grow as a person
A lot of people use personality type as an excuse for why they are the way that they are. While it might help to know that you’re an introvert and that you need alone time, the purpose of that knowledge isn’t so that you can let your partner do all the housework while you get “alone time” watching Netflix because it’s just your “personality .” Rather, the point of knowing your type is so that you can know how you specifically can grow as a person. In this example, you would use your knowledge of yourself as an introvert to plan plenty of alone time into your week so you can also fulfill your responsibilities. Or better yet, you can start paying attention to the type of alone time that is most fulfilling to you. For me, watching Netflix doesn’t really count as alone time because it doesn’t do much to restore me or fill me up. I’m much better suited to read a book or spend time writing. Having that kind of self-knowledge can really make a difference in how you spend your time.
MBTI helps you understand other people better
Knowing how my brain works also helps me know how other people’s brains work. For example, I’m a Thinker. I make decisions based on what seems most logical to me rather than basing them on how they feel or what they’ll mean for those I love. To be sure, I include the feelings of other people when I’m considering the logic, but that’s not my primary motivation. People who are Feelers are oftentimes much more compassionate than I am and do a better job of sharing their emotions with others. Knowing the strengths of a Feeler helps me be less judgmental of them. I can focus on the positive traits instead of thinking of them as irrational and weak-willed, and I have a better understanding of why they’re making a decision that seems irrational to me. And knowing the strengths of a Thinker helps me feel less threatened by Feelers. Being able to make decisions without emotions clouding them is definitely a strength. We need both types.
Maybe you’ve always struggled with planning activities with other people. Your best friend might be a fly-by-the-seat-of-her-pants type, and it drives you up the wall. She texts you at 10 am Saturday morning to ask you if you want to get coffee that afternoon and it makes you feel like she doesn’t value your friendship enough to plan ahead. That’s not really what’s going on though. She isn’t doing that in an attempt to ruin your weekend plans or because she doesn’t care about you. It’s a difference in personalities. Some people (Judgers) like to plan ahead. They make schedules and stick to it. Others (Perceivers) love to be flexible and are constantly reevaluating what the best options are. She texted you because she realized that spending time with you was the best possible way to spend her afternoon. I’m sure you can see how understanding different personality types can help reduce a lot of friction in your relationships.
Understanding other people better helps your relationships
We touched on this in the earlier paragraph, but underdasting personality types is incredibly helpful for your relationships. Maybe you don’t understand why your dad has to know why you’re telling him something before you start telling him. Maybe your partner’s insistence on talking to every single person you walk by in the grocery store drives you crazy. Whatever it is, knowing how your brains work differently can make it so much easier to be patient with the people in your life.
Not only that, but knowing your own personality type can help you better explain yourself to someone who just doesn’t get you. Maybe your sister doesn’t understand why it bothers you so much when she constantly starts arguments about philosophy. Maybe you drive your sister crazy by always playing the devil’s advocate in discussions. Both of these things can better be understood through personality types. When you understand it yourself, it’s easier to explain it to others. That still doesn’t mean that you get to use your personality as an excuse. You’re just helping people understand while you work to meet in the middle.
MBTI helps you at work
One of the great things about learning your type is that it helps you know your strengths and weaknesses, which is invaluable for your work life. Maybe you’re a Perceiver and you love to be able go go with the flow and have a slightly more flexible work schedule. Maybe inconsistency drives you crazy. Knowing your preferences more clearly can help you make decisions for your job, and even what kind of job you’re in. When you know your weaknesses, you can put systems in place to help you stay on top of things.
Understanding personality types can also be incredibly useful in work relationships as well. You’ll be able to communicate your needs to your boss better. If you’re a manager, you’ll be able to delegate tasks to the right person. You’ll also be able to tell when your personality differences are what’s driving you crazy about a co-worker and when it’s something else. MBTI is definitely a great tool to use in the workplace.
Specific ways knowing I’m an INTP has helped me
I know I need to resist the tendency to never try things until I’m perfect.
This has been a huge barrier for me in starting a blog. I felt like I had to know all the things about blogging before I ever started one myself. If I had started when I wanted to half a decade ago, I would know a lot more than I do now. Done is better than perfect. That’s a mantra that I have to repeat to myself a lot.
I know I need to force myself to get out there and do things.
I could seriously spend the majority of my life all in my head. Knowing this tendency helps me better realize that I should do more in the physical world. When I get home from spending all day staring into a computer at work, instead of opening up a book and spending more time in my head, I can choose to do yoga and then cook dinner. And THEN I’ll read my book 😉
I know I’m not emotionally broken.
I realize this sounds a little melodramatic, but I’ve honestly wondered this many times in my life. Like when I don’t cry during a really sad movie, or I don’t feel strong emotions while an emotionally-charged event is taking place. I’m not broken, my brain just works differently. I definitely still feel emotions, and strong ones at that. I just have the tendency to ignore them. Now I’m learning to pay more attention to what I’m feeling.
Where to learn more
If you’re wanting to learn more about your personality type, this is a great book to read. In this book, Anne has an entire chapter on different personality frameworks, explaining what they are and why they’re useful. And, of course, she has an entire chapter devoted to MBTI.
This book is written by Isabel Briggs Myers herself. Though I haven’t read it myself, I’ve been told that it’s incredibly useful and a great place to start.
I’m currently reading this book about the different types’ creativity. I love that the author does away with the idea that there are creative types and non-creative types. We all create in our own ways. This book is a great way to learn your creative strengths.
I’ve been listening to the Personality Hacker Podcast off and on for a couple years and find it incredibly informative. After you find your type, you can search for it and listen to episodes that specifically touch on your personality.
Leave a comment and let me know your personality type! I’d love to learn more about your journeys as well!
